Drummond brothers in panic mode due to record rainfall
Blood pressure is rising on Kunyung Road, for anal-retentive Kunyung Cup co-founders and Kunyung locals, Mitch and Tim Drummond. Having not slept in weeks as an unprecedented third La Niña clouds pre-match proceedings, and with barely a ball bowled this season in grade cricket, Tim appears ready to snap (a la Ned Flanders after a hurricane demolished his home) as he incorrectly enters another line of code into his convoluted scoresheet. Frustrated, Tim screams expletives at Clippy, his Microsoft Office assistant, who is taunting him in the corner of his Excel spreadsheet.
A 28 year-old pathetic loser who still lives at home, Tim’s frustration boils over after his mother, Arlene, admonishes him for his colourful language.
“I’m at my wit’s end. Is Mitch going to do anything? He’s talking about setting up more cameras this year;” adding with an eye roll, “I can’t wait for even more footage that will never see the light of day.”
Meanwhile, Mitch, who has become Australia’s top Social Media influencer, has his own solution to the inevitable washout: “I’ve rigged up a 250m diameter glass dome on a pulley system to avoid rain delays, but the acoustics are all wrong,” he sighed.
“As a backup, I’ve got Jane Bunn on speed dial. I got Beau to re-stump her farm house, so she owes me a favour.”
With two years between the last match, much has changed in the world. How will the weather play out? Will Tim ever move out? What will the makeup of the teams be? Will John Clark have room in his busy schedule for such trivialities? Will James Graham dominate with the ball in another heroic individual performance? Will Jacob Mehtens kill another child innocently swinging on the playground? Only time will tell.
